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Monday, August 9, 2010

Some Movies Just Insult My Intelligence

I just finished watching a goofy Steven Seagal movie called, "Flight of Fury". I actually had seen it before but I had forgotten about it. I think Seagal wrote and directed some of this so that may explain some of the goofiness. I can put up with a little historical inaccuracy in the name of dramatic effect, but this one was over the top.

They start out with the hijacking of the new super duper F-77 stealth fighter which looks like an F-117 Nighthawk. The difference is that the F-77 is not only stealthy to radar but in fact it can disappear entirely.....poof, invisible! Well, I'm OK with that concept, but when the F-77 was hijacked from Edwards Air Force Base in California, it was flown non-stop from California to Afghanistan. I guess Seagal gave no thought to the fact that such an aircraft would have to have several in-fligh refuelings to make it that far........hmmmm, so much for a long distance hijacking! Oh wait! Maybe it runs on green technology or something!

Next Seagal was sent to Afghanistan to rescue the F-77. He flew there in an SR-71 Blackbird, which is a semistealthy, high altitude (80,000 feet plus), mach 3 plus spy aircraft once used by the air force and the CIA for spy missions. It flew so high and so fast that it was mostly invulnerable to attack by other aircraft or missiles.

Well, they flew out of the United States and during the flight there was talk about the blackbird entering "North Korean and Vietnamese" airspace. I found this interesting since North Korea and Vietnam are nowhere near each other. Thankfully, they did refuel one time in the air, but I'm not sure where.

So the plan is to LAND the SR-71 somewhere in the wilds of Afghanistan. Last time I checked, the SR-71 needed a long (several thousand feet) and improved (concrete or asphalt) runway on which to land. It just so happened that one of those was out there in the middle of nowhere.

Somewhere around this time, they lost radio contact with Seagal. A 2 star air force general was shown running around wringing his hands and screaming, "Somebody do something!" When I was in the service, I knew a couple of generals and admirals. Even if they did not know what was going on, you'd never know the difference. I let out a good old Facebook LOL when I saw this!

In the event that Seagal was not successful in retrieving the F-77, there was an alternate plan by the navy to launch a strike from a carrier in the "Gulf of Arabia"......dunno where that is..........I'm thinking the Persian Gulf would be the accurate term, and just flatten the place where the F-77 was being held hostage.

Well, when they showed the aircraft being launched from the carrier, they showed a mixture of FA-18s and F-14s. However, when they showed pictures of the squadron in route to the target, we were treated to a bunch of air force F-16s (totally different airplane and not suitable for carrier operations). Geez this is tiresome. You would think they could have come up with a few pictures of FA-18s in flight.

Finally Seagal rescues the F-77, but the hijacker chases after him in an F-16. In a bit they proceed to dogfight. Sorry to say, but an F-16 would beat the pants off a F-117/F-77 each and every time. The F-117 was never meant to go head to head with another aircraft in a dogfight. Anyway, Seagal managed to shoot down the F-16 with a heat seeking missile. Boy that guy is good!

And after the dogfight, they flew the F-77 all the way back to the United States non-stop!

I really hate it when movie and TV writers insult my intelligence. You'd think they could spend a little extra time and do their homework! I am especially critical of medical shows too for obvious reasons.

Well, if you've never seen "Flight of Fury" and I have ruined it for you, don't worry. After you watch it you won't care.

4 comments:

  1. If I want lame and stupid, I can always watch the news on MSNBC.

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  2. I wondered about that Gulf of Arabia too, never heard the term before. And they flew from California, across Siberia and then across China. Something wrong with that flight path.

    Debbie
    Right Truth
    http://www.righttruth.typepad.com

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  3. I'm with you...Hollywood knows so little about aircraft and weapons of any type. Ruins the entire movie for me, regardless of how good the rest of it is.

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  4. David, agree with MSNBC.

    Sweetie, all they had to do was look at a world map and they could have gotten it right.

    Mushy, Hollywood knows little about real life experience. I read once that the "trauma code" resuscitation rate on the show ER was 87%. I real life it is more like 0%. The moral of the story is, "when you're dead, you're dead!"

    ReplyDelete