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Tuesday, November 29, 2011

When Sanny Claus Becomes Nanny Claus

I always thought it was the responsibility of the head of the household to determine what material things could be afforded by the family and adjust budgets accordingly. I would assume that would apply to Christmas shopping as well. If times are tight then, well, you just don't spend as much. You might have to tell the little kiddies that you just can't afford to pay Santa Claus as much as you did last year. In fact I remember when I was a kid that was the tactic my parents used to explain to me that Christmas presents were not free. My Momma used to tell me that Daddy would have to figure out a way to "pay Santa Claus". So from my very early remembrances I was under the impression that nothing in life, including Christmas, is free. Of course the other alternative is the gubment model of taking your piece of plastic and incurring enormous debt that probably won't be paid off before next year's Christmas.

Well, now I have discovered that personal responsibility for the family debt has been removed from the breadwinner and instead has been assigned to Santa Clause himself. Students of the Charles W. Howard Santa Claus School in Midland, Michigan are being taught to "lower children's expectations in the economic downturn"

"They should also take a look at the children's parents and 'size them up' before promising them something that their mother and father can't afford."

This is a very sad commentary on the state of life in these United States here in 2011. In the first place we have all these little entitlement minded kids running around wanting this, that, and the other thing, thinking that money grows on trees. Well it's no wonder when you look at the behavior of the glorious federal gubment. And then you have wimpy parents that don't have the stones to explain to little Johnny that perhaps we can't afford to pay Santa Claus for his platinum covered, diamond studded new game controller this year. No, instead all these tough decisions are going to be left up to good old Santa Claus.

Here's a good one:

"The school has also been advising its pupils on how to deal with such questions as: 'Can you bring my daddy a job?'"

My answer, "Fire Hussein Obama!" Wow! Santa Claus school would be a snap for me.

I guess I didn't even know there was such a thing as a Santa Claus school. In fact I never even considered making a career as a Santa Claus. We had better be careful because some of the mainstream institutions of higher learning may start offering degrees in "Santa Claus". And of course we'll have more whining from the alumni that they can't find a job or pay back their student loans along with those that majored in Basket Weaving and Urban Studies in Upper Volta. 

Boys and girls, when Santa Claus is tasked with making our financial decisions, we are in serious trouble. By the way, just in case you forgot, you can celebrate the birth of Jesus for FREE! Won't cost you a thing! 
 The Charles W. Howard Santa Claus School. Tuition $415 for a three day Santa Claus course.

Go HERE to read all about how to convert Sanny Claus into a Nanny Claus.

1 comment:

  1. Actually basket-weaving can lead to a very good job. So we can take that one off our lists.

    To pay for the holidays (Try 8 nights of Chanukah.) I put some things on lay-away, and bought gifts all year round.

    Or we didn't give out too many gifts. We budgeted $100 per child (2) and $100 for each other.

    Family and friends got homemade gifts (Food, Sweaters, etc...) in my homemade baskets. And one very old fruitcake got filled with rum and shipped out to an unsuspecting relative or friend. (I wonder if it is still good?)

    But we were creative. And I taught this trait to my girls.